It’s an interesting Monday today, first “real” back to work day. You could say that last Friday was that day but it wasn’t really, just the lonely few trying to not get caught browsing the internet and getting nothing done….. Today, this Monday of Mondays is the real day. Colleagues return fresh from the obligatory Xmas, New Year Break with debts, broken resolutions and a whole stack of stuff they should have finished off in 2014.
Once everyone’s nicely settled back into their routine, fresh coffees and resolved not to finish whatever it was that’s left over from last year the questions start….
“So what did YOU DO for Christmas Day?”
Do not be fooled this is not someone who is genuinely interested in the board games, over indulgence and gentle snooze that accompanied your christmas or even the irritating Uncle who made lewd jokes. This is their opportunity to demonstrate how they had the perfect Xmas and it comes in waves.
“I cooked a sixteen course Christmas lunch with hand decorated crackers (not sure if you have these in the US, you pull and they go bang. Google it.) Home made stuffing is so much more authentic don’t you think? Our Goose and lamb (you must have choice) was fair-trade, reared by hand and picked up from the convenient organic farm round the corner. The two animals had a full psychological assessment before being painlessly slaughtered and both Goose and Lamb felt that they couldn’t have been consumed by a nicer set of people.”
The second question is always “Was Santa good to you?”. Depending on how your christmas was (Yes, actually Santa bought me diamonds, a tiara and a Ferrari….) this is their opportunity to wax lyrical on two levels the first about how “loved” they are… Think thoughtful indulgent presents some handmade or vintage in the first instance and in the second think bling this years bag, dress or holiday.
So how was “Your” christmas…. I promise not too gloat let me know in the comments below….